chroma | catchall for vin

[countermeasures]

i haven't had coffee yet so this won't be pretty yet

Comments

[countermeasures]

[fair and valid]

Medical books, to learn new techniques... but I also like poetry.

[allomantic]

[nodding slightly]

...It does seem like it suits you.

[countermeasures]

Thank you... I think?

[she smiles]

Poetry will usually be less dense than other books are. Why don't we find a book of poems to practice with?

[allomantic]

[she nods.]

Maybe we will find one you recognize.

[countermeasures]

Maybe we will...

[her voice trails off a little, and she brings a hand up to brush her fingertips against her throat. for a moment, she seems on the verge of saying something, but then she shakes her head and continues on down the bookshelves, looking for poems.]

[allomantic]

[a beat, surprised.]

...Is there something wrong?

[countermeasures]

...no, it's fine. My mind just wandered for a moment or two.

[thinking about poetry she recognizes made her think of home which gave her the weirdest urge to talk about her sad backstory?




unfortunately she's kind of cagey about that so she bites her lip and continues searching for poetry instead.]

[allomantic]

I see...

[she still sounds a little bit concerned, but she won't push further.]

[countermeasures]

...aha! Here's something.

[she offers vin a book. yes, i know this is a website and not a book, but we're going to pretend everything in those links is contained in the pages.]

[allomantic]

[taking the book carefully and flipping through it.]

Which is your favorite?

[countermeasures]

Hmm... they're all pretty in their own way. They evoke a certain kind of feeling.

[she looks over vin's shoulder to see which pages she's looking at.]

There's one I like about peach blossoms at a temple... ah, there!

[she reaches over to tap the page, then recites.]

"Across the world this June, the petals have all fallen,
But the mountain temple's peach blossom has just begun to bloom.
I regretted so much that spring had gone without a trace;
I didn't know that it had only moved up here."

[allomantic]

[she's silent for a moment, thinking that over.]

What do you take from it?

[countermeasures]

It depends on my mood when I read it...

Sometimes, it's inspiring. Even if you think you've lost something, it might not be gone for good. You might be able to find it somewhere else, if you look a little harder.

But sometimes it reminds me that good things can leave you and go to someone else.

[allomantic]

[that makes her seem even more thoughtful.]'

What do you think right now, then?

[countermeasures]

...it's a little closer to the second one, I think.

[allomantic]

[a tiny little smile, though it's thoughtful more than it is happy.]

Someone told me once that luck, or happiness, comes in waves, kind of. That if you've faced sorrow or adversity, it would mean that good things would come your way shortly. After everything that I've been through, I told him that would just make me worry that if something good happened to me, I would be scared the world would take it away soon.

[...ah. she pauses, blinking.]

I don't know why I... Never mind.

[countermeasures]

[oh no vin...]

...you didn't mean to share that, did you?

[a beat...]

Don't worry. I won't tell anyone... but I'm afraid I won't be able to forget I heard it, either.

[allomantic]

[she nods at that first part, affirming that she didn't mean to say it, but at the second portion of what jiuqing says... she looks a little uncomfortable, but not strictly unhappy.]

You... do not need to remember it. It is not important.

[countermeasures]

It hits a little close to home. I don't think I can forget, even if you'd prefer that I did.

[allomantic]

I see.

[she pauses for a moment, awkward, but:]

I would not mind hearing about it, if you wanted.

[countermeasures]

...

[on the one hand, she doesn't really want to talk about it. or rather - she doesn't know how to talk about it. in all the years since her life had started to get complicated, she'd never once explained any of it to anyone. she couldn't.

but there's that urge, to talk. to share. and vin has been easy for her to get along with. she'll understand, won't she...?

jiuqing's fingers brush against her throat again.]

...years ago, my aunt and cousin came to live with my father, my mother, and me. My mother was happy to see her sister again, and I was happy to meet my cousin. It felt like my family had gotten larger, and I trusted them so much.

But they... it wasn't what it seemed.

[...]

I treated Waner like she was my actual sister. I loved her like one. And it turned out that she was. [she bites her lip.] My father and my aunt had been having an affair all along. They'd plotted together and lied to my mother and me, so they could move in with us. And then they tried to get rid of us both. They...

[her voice trails off. her fingers linger at her throat for a moment, and then she drops her hand to her side.]

...they weren't to be trusted. So what you said... it reminded me of that. I thought they'd brought good things into my life, but they'd really only come to take away every good thing that I had.

[allomantic]

[oh. oh, that's horrifying, and she has to take a second to let it sink in. it isn't what she would have expected to hear, unsurprisingly, but that doesn't mean she doubts it at all. a frown grows on her face, sympathetic, as she tries to decide what to say to all that. if she seems angry, it certainly isn't directed at the person she's speaking to.]

...It must have been painful. [in a way she can't really comprehend, given her complicated family dynamics.] I understand now why you told me you cut ties with him.

[the way jiuqing's hand moves to her neck for a moment doesn't escape vin's notice, but she doesn't comment on it directly.]

Was your mother alright?

[countermeasures]

...it hurt her a lot, when she realized what was going on. She loved my father, and she trusted her sister.

[betrayal.]

But she divorced him and moved out. She's doing much better now.

[allomantic]

[nodding again.]

Trusting someone and having that trust broken... Someone told me once that it is more difficult because it does not stop you from loving them.

[but, that being said...]

I am glad both of you were safe.

[countermeasures]

[eh. she honestly does not give one single fuck about her father, her aunt, or her cousin anymore, but she's sure it's harder for her mom.]

That person sounds very wise.

...I'm glad we are, too. I'd do anything if it kept my mother safe.