It didn't make sense to. We don't know how much time we might have left, so... we might as well be honest with each other, and make the best of the time that we do have.
Thank you. It's... nicer than I'd imagined - I really hadn't thought...
[her voice trails off. between her husband in her first life being garbage, and lin yue pushing her away to protect her in her more recent memories - she'd been right back to "all men are the same, love is nonsense" before all of this started.
and that would have been fine. she's always been fine on her own - better, in some ways.
but this is fine, too.]
...we both have things we need to take care of in our homelands. But, once the war with Yan is over and once I've seen to my patients, I plan to visit him often in Great Liang. And he's said that if he can, he'd like to come visit me, too.
[there's that.
and if it turns out that they don't get worldhopping, well - they'll both just deal with it.]
We both understand that we have things that... have to come first, even if we don't necessarily like it. ...it's kind of a relief that he gets that, really.
It's... incredible when someone understands you and can accept the choices you make, isn't it?
[ When those choices aren't always so easily understandable or acceptable. Unbelievable, in its own way.
She may not have come to like anyone the way that Jiuqing and Chang Geng have come to like each other, but that is something she's gotten to see a glimpse of herself—the belief that maybe someone could actually accept her. It's an uncomfortable feeling for Roxana. ]
That's why I think you two suit each other.
[ Roxana's ic ship opinions are so funny for how she isn't actually that invested in other people's romances, but sometimes, you just have opinions about people. ]
[i want to see roxana's ship chart, but also like, her anti-ship chat? which people does she wish to see never interact with each other ever...]
It is.
[jiuqing hadn't expected it, but - it's happened, and she's glad for it.]
...I hope you're able to find someone like that too, Miss Roxana. Someone who really understands you. [she smiles] Maybe someone who will help you deal with things back in your world.
[personally, she is brought great joy by the thought of roxana fucking up the agrece family's shit.]
...well. If one more offer wouldn't be unwelcome...
[...
qian and waner did not do much good in the world.
but. they did teach her - however unintentionally - a method of creating a deadly and nearly undetectable poison. jiuqing may not use it herself, but the knowledge is there, and if it's something from her world, roxana's enemies won't know to guard against it.
...and she trusts roxana to only use it against people who deserve it.
(this might be going a little differently if her victim had been anyone but garou.)]
They don't have a plant called dream laurel in your world, do they?
But the scent of dream laurel interacts with storax incense when it's burning to create a deadly, airborne poison. It wouldn't be easily detected by someone who isn't familiar with the properties of both.
That's what I thought. ...there are times when softer methods just won't work.
[jiuqing tends to favor softer methods - especially now that she's at a point where she's able to let people in to help her a little more than she was at the start of her second life - but her hands aren't exactly clean, either.
the ends may not always justify the means, but... sometimes they do. she thinks that they do for herself, and she feels a certain kinship with roxana - so, she imagines they do for her, as well.]
So. Dream laurel and storax incense - if you can think of some use for them, you need only let me know. I can procure it easily enough in Daxing.
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and then tilts her head to one side at the question.]
He has other people to spend time with than just me...
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[ She mirrors the head tilt. ]
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[they were practically joined at the hip all through trial.]
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[ Give her the deets. ]
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[ That's so fast. She'd be impressed, if romance were actually she could find in her heart. ]
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[...]
It didn't make sense to. We don't know how much time we might have left, so... we might as well be honest with each other, and make the best of the time that we do have.
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People are deserving of it. ]
I'm glad you two could be honest with each other. I'm happy for you two.
[ This is one of the few relationships where she doesn't think there's terrible taste involved. Incredible. ]
If things go as planned, what do you plan to do next?
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[her voice trails off. between her husband in her first life being garbage, and lin yue pushing her away to protect her in her more recent memories - she'd been right back to "all men are the same, love is nonsense" before all of this started.
and that would have been fine. she's always been fine on her own - better, in some ways.
but this is fine, too.]
...we both have things we need to take care of in our homelands. But, once the war with Yan is over and once I've seen to my patients, I plan to visit him often in Great Liang. And he's said that if he can, he'd like to come visit me, too.
[there's that.
and if it turns out that they don't get worldhopping, well - they'll both just deal with it.]
We both understand that we have things that... have to come first, even if we don't necessarily like it. ...it's kind of a relief that he gets that, really.
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[ When those choices aren't always so easily understandable or acceptable. Unbelievable, in its own way.
She may not have come to like anyone the way that Jiuqing and Chang Geng have come to like each other, but that is something she's gotten to see a glimpse of herself—the belief that maybe someone could actually accept her. It's an uncomfortable feeling for Roxana. ]
That's why I think you two suit each other.
[ Roxana's ic ship opinions are so funny for how she isn't actually that invested in other people's romances, but sometimes, you just have opinions about people. ]
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It is.
[jiuqing hadn't expected it, but - it's happened, and she's glad for it.]
...I hope you're able to find someone like that too, Miss Roxana. Someone who really understands you. [she smiles] Maybe someone who will help you deal with things back in your world.
[personally, she is brought great joy by the thought of roxana fucking up the agrece family's shit.]
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Her smile is faint. ]
There have been offers to help, but I don't know if anyone truly understands me.
[ Because she hasn't really let anyone. How much she keeps hidden, how much she keeps a distance, how much she's been dishonest about herself. ]
Things will work out at home, if we're able to return. I assure you.
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[...
qian and waner did not do much good in the world.
but. they did teach her - however unintentionally - a method of creating a deadly and nearly undetectable poison. jiuqing may not use it herself, but the knowledge is there, and if it's something from her world, roxana's enemies won't know to guard against it.
...and she trusts roxana to only use it against people who deserve it.
(this might be going a little differently if her victim had been anyone but garou.)]
They don't have a plant called dream laurel in your world, do they?
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She tilts her head, curious. ]
No, we don't. What does it do?
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[it's not so bad on its own, really.]
But the scent of dream laurel interacts with storax incense when it's burning to create a deadly, airborne poison. It wouldn't be easily detected by someone who isn't familiar with the properties of both.
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It doesn't show much, but Roxana is a little perplexed by this offer. ]
You would trust me with this?
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[ Deserve is such a subjective term, but Roxana never plans anything for no reason. Anything terrible she does is never mired in only emotion.
It doesn't make it good or right, but for as much as she is an exemplary member of the Agrece family, she is also separate from them. ]
I never hurt anyone for no reason.
[ She told Clarte this when they asked she murdered Garou, and it's as true now as it was then. ]
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That's what I thought. ...there are times when softer methods just won't work.
[jiuqing tends to favor softer methods - especially now that she's at a point where she's able to let people in to help her a little more than she was at the start of her second life - but her hands aren't exactly clean, either.
the ends may not always justify the means, but... sometimes they do. she thinks that they do for herself, and she feels a certain kinship with roxana - so, she imagines they do for her, as well.]
So. Dream laurel and storax incense - if you can think of some use for them, you need only let me know. I can procure it easily enough in Daxing.