countermeasures | chroma | catchall for hot pants

[there's a flare of anger at that - not directed at hot pants, though. at the situation in general. it's tempered by determination.]

Until we find some way to stop this.

Yes. I don't...want to keep going in circles. We can't. For the sake of us all.

[Everyone here deserves to live. She herself...]

[She closes her eyes.]

If we have to tear this place down to do it, I would.

...we have to find a way out of this, somehow. No matter what it takes.

Yes. And I want to do it without...risking anyone in the process. Though, if it comes to it...

[Her voice drifts off at that.]

...you had best not be about to say, "if it comes to it, I will risk myself," Miss Hot Pants.

[Oh.]

[Caught in the act!]

[But her sorrow pangs at that, deep.]

...I didn't tell you, did I?

...tell me what?

[hmm. she sounds nervous about what her answer might be. i swear to god if you're about to have her say she's dead, crystal...]

........

[A sigh. She's looking at that sprout, again, melancholy hanging over her, even through the exhaustion and pain coming from her.]

I'm already dead, Su.

Edited 2022-03-19 04:36 (UTC)

[motherfucker.]

I won't accept that. You're living and breathing right now.

...

["Right now".]

Yes, well. I am. So I'll use this borrowed time as much as I can.

No, that's not good enough.

You're going to hold onto your life even after we get out of here. It's not borrowed time - it's your time, and you're going to keep it. Promise me.

What if its not as simple as that?

[Because she wants to believe in that. That she can go back, and she can continue to live life, but...]

[There's a dread of inevitability. That she'll return, and it'll be right back where she was. Dying. Dead. Gone.]

Miss Hot Pants.

[jiuqing's vibes are very certain - but then, they would be, wouldn't they? waking up to a second chance at life is nothing new to her. this is perhaps not quite the situation as her own case, but the facts are the same: hot pants was dead, and now she's live.

they'll find a way back to their own worlds, but she doesn't believe that hot pants will simply drop dead after leaving the prism.]

I believe that when someone is given a second chance, it's for a reason. So... there's no way that it's just going to be the end for you once all of this - [she waves a hand to indicate their current situation] - is over.

You saw my memories. What would you tell me if I said that it was perfectly fine for me to take risks, because I had already died once?

I know your memories, Su.

[Her emotions...react with a sort of understanding, and for a moment, it almost feels like she's ready to believe - except something seems to drag them back to where they once were, like they're stuck in a rut, unable to be free.]

I mean...you do what you can with your life. And its good you have a second chance. Its what you deserve.

[jiuqing reaches up and gently takes hot pants's chin to make sure she's looking at her.]

You deserve that, too. I truly believe that.

[Her emotions falter at that touch, eyes hesitating before glancing back at her. Warmth, uncertainty, but that overall melancholy sitting in her bones, unable to let go.]

I'm not a good person, Su. At least...I'm trying to make it up for not being one. I don't know if I deserve that much.